Klan Looking to Hire PR Agency To Improve Its Image

Members of the KKK (Martin/Flickr)
Members of the KKK (Martin/Flickr)

By Jamal Whiteman

The KKK is considering hiring a PR agency to help improve it’s image.

“The klan’s image is so bad now, we need to hire one of them fancy jew PR companies to help us improve our image,” said Merle Wyatt, grand dragon of the Little Rock Knights of the Ku Klux Klan, in a radio interview. “We do lots of good things, like adopting highways and donating toys to children. But people only think of the bad stuff that went on in the past.”

Wyatt added the klan is no longer a hate group, but more of a separatist group.

“We don’t hate the n**gers, even though they stink and steal all the time,” Wyatt said. “We don’t even hate the fag, butt pirates. I mean, some of them are great hairdressers. We just don’t want to be around them.”

Wyatt’s views were echoed by an Imperial Grand Wizard in an interview with Richmond, Va.’s NBC 12.

“We are not white supremacists. We are white separatists,” he said. “We choose to stay within our own race. We are not the big bad hate group that everybody thinks we are. A lot of people, as soon as they hear the words Ku Klux Klan, their mind automatically goes back to the 50s and 60s. It was a pretty bad time, but that was the 1950s and 60s. We are living in a different century now.”

However, Wyatt couldn’t resist one last piece of hate speech.

“We still hate Muslim terrorists,” he said. “We need to bomb the s**t out of them, just like Donald Trump said.”

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