FOX News Viewers Say They Can’t Vote For Hillary Because She Isn’t Hot Enough

Hillary Clinton
Hillary Clinton

By Jamal Whiteman

Hillary Clinton is likely going to be the Democratic presidential candidate. But does she have any cross-party appeal? To try to figure this out The Business Standard News conducted a focus group of FOX News viewers and asked what they thought of her. The results weren’t pretty.

“She looks like a worn-out grandma,” said Dale Higgins, a FOX News viewer from St. Louis. “She definitely doesn’t give me a boner.”

Roger Wallace, a conservative Republican from New York, agreed. “She’s too old,” he said. “Can you imagine watching her give press conferences? It would be like watching paint dry. Sarah Palin may have been as dumb as a box of rocks, but at least she was nice to look at.”

“She doesn’t look like any of the women on FOX News,” said Bob Cranson from Houston, Texas. “The FOX women are hot. I don’t listen to them half the time, but they’re great to look at. I expect my female politicians to be the same.”

Jay Peters, a tea partier from Bangor, Maine, questioned Hillary Clinton’s sexuality.

“Cankles looks like a militant dyke,” Peters said. “If I can’t get it up for her, I ain’t going to vote for her.”

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